Anoopa Sharma

Michael Kramer is a close friend of Anoopa's from Emory University. At the Altanta memorial service last week he spoke about her, and he shared quotes from many friends, family, and friends that expressed the far-reaching and deep impact of her life and her loss. Here he shares a summary of the memorial service.

On Thursday afternoon, March 24th, the Atlanta and Emory University community came together on Emory’s campus to grieve together the loss of Anoopa, and to celebrate her life. The memorial was sponsored by the Office of Campus Ministry and the Epidemiology Department in the school of public health.

In all about 150-200 of us gathered in Cannon Chapel on the Emory Campus. We were a diverse group including the University president, Deans of the Graduate school and of the School of Public Health, the entire epidemiology faculty, many faculty from other departments, and friends from Emory, from Atlanta, and some people who never even knew Anoopa, but were drawn by her story, her energy. In addition Anoopa’s mother Anita Sharma, and her uncle Spencer Nayan Joshi were present and participated.

The service opened with flute music by epidemiology faculty member David Kleinbaum (member of a jazz group that Anoopa enjoyed), and then readings, reflections, memories and a song, from several faculty and friends. A feeling developed (for me at least) of how our personal experiences of Anoopa’s joy, energy and presence were complemented and expanded upon by hearing the experiences and feelings of others. We seemed to see a more complete Anoopa by sharing our memories, love and grief together.

While so many tears were shed together, and so much sadness persists, there was also some comfort in communal grieving and in communal celebration. The service closed with a soulful rendition of Amazing Grace on flute by Dr. Kleinbaum, and then an energetic recording of Ella Fitzgerald singing You ain’t got a thing (if you ain’t got that swing), which had been a recent favorite of Anoopa’s. Following the service there was ample opportunity for more informal sharing, crying, and celebrating as a slide show of ‘Anoopa pictures’ and the Fox5News story that aired after her death were shown.

The Emory University newspaper, the Emory Wheel, featured Anoopa in an article yesterday, Friday, March 26, 2005. Executive staff writer Supriya Kotagal wrote about Anoopa's life and our loss.

We have the Atlanta Fox 5 news coverage to share. It's just under four minutes long and in WMV format. Thanks go to John Brunet and Jack Houman at the Rollins School of Public Health for their help with capturing and editing the video.

VIDEO: AnoopaNewsVideo.wmv (5 megs)

Anoopa's mom, Anita, would like to share some information in preparation for the April 2nd memorial service at Rajdhani Mandir, a Hindu temple, at 3pm. Everyone is welcome; it will be a special time to meet and support other loved ones of Anoopa and an opportunity to celebrate her life.

Please carpool to the temple. There is limited parking available.

The service will begin promptly at 3, so please plan to arrive early enough to park and make your way into the temple.

The Pooja is a ceremony to rest Anoopa's soul in peace. It will be mostly in Sanskrit and Hindi, but we will try to explain some of it in English so everyone understands the ceremony.

There is no particular restriction or requirement for the clothing worn at the temple other than you must remove your shoes before entering the Pooja hall. Wear something comfortable as we will be sitting on the floor for the service. It is not essential to cover your head and there is no color restriction for clothing. Just choose something respectful for a temple or church.

In addition to the ceremony, we plan to read some of Anoopa's writings and offer friends and family some time to share memories and thoughts about Anoopa. All are welcome to speak, pray, or sing, so please come prepared to share if you are interested.

The Sharmas are very thankful for the flowers sent to their home, but there is not space to accommodate more. They request that if you wish to send flowers, send them to the temple next week: Thursday, Friday or Saturday. We can use them for the memorial services on Saturday.

Although it is not necessary to bring food, many of you have asked for guidance. After the memorial services there will be a small reception with tea/coffee. It may be alright to bring finger foods, cheese, fruit and veggie platters for the reception. PLEASE NOTE THAT FOODS WITH ANY TYPE OF MEATS ARE NOT TO BE BROUGHT TO THE TEMPLE.

After the memorial services the guests are NOT expected to go to the Sharma house. Out-of-towners, close friends and family will return to the house later that evening.

For friends traveling from out of town, we suggest you search online for hotel options in Chantily, VA. This is a good location for a relatively economical hotel that's convienient to the airport and the temple, and is also close to restaurants and such. See below some options Anita researched:

Here is some information on hotels near Dulles airport that is about 8
miles from the temple.
The rates are for rooms with one Q or two Q beds.

Hampton Inn, 4050 Westfax Drive, Chantilly. Tel 703-818-8200
Wknd rate (Fri-Sat) $69/$79, Sunday $159

Fairfield Inn 3960 Corsair Ct, Chantilly. Tel 703-435-1111
Wknd rate (Fri-Sat) $69/$79, Sunday $139

Courtyard-Marriott 3935 Centerview Drive, Chantilly. Tel 703-709-7100
Wknd rate (Fri-Sat) $89/$99, Sunday $189

ExtendedStayHotels.com, 14420 Chantilly Crossing Ln, Chantilly. Tel
703-263-7173
Wknd rate (Fri-Sat) $80/$86, Sunday $111. Will provide a small discount
if 10-15 rooms are booked...tell them you are here for Anoopa Sharma
Memorial Service.

These are located within easy reach of the Dulles airport and the
temple.
They have other locations in Fairfax which may be fine except the
distance to the temple will be about 15-20 miles.
The area of Fair Lakes may also be suitable as you can easily get on to
the Fairfax county Parkway (North) and exit on Rt 50 west to get to the
temple.

The weather forecast is
Friday Temp 63/48 sunny, scattered showers poss

A memorial service will be held at 3pm on Saturday, April 2 at Rajdhani Mandir, a Hindu temple in Chantilly, VA. There will be a Hindu service as well as an opportunity for friends and family to share memories, thoughts, and prayers for Anoopa. All are welcome. Check here for additional details as they become available.

Emory University will be holding a memorial service for for Anoopa this Thursday, March 24, 2005, from 3-4PM in Cannon Chapel on Emory's Campus in Atlanta. There will be a reception afterward. It is open to the public.

Here is an update from Uttama.

hi everyone,
my family finally left birmingham, alabama on march 17,
thursday and drove to atlanta with my uncle. today we
spent most of the day packing up anoopa's room. we leave
on saturday to return to fairfax, virginia. i am looking
forward to returning home and having some time to reflect.

anoopa's heart, liver, and pancreas were all transplanted
within a few hours of their removal and given to patients
in the birmingham hospital. her right kidney was sent to
someone in oregon and her left kidney was given to her
aunt in atlanta. we visited her in the hospital today and
yesterday and she is doing well. she will be discharged
from the hospital on saturday.

also, the local fox news in atlanta interviewed my family
yesterday and the story was shown at 5:45pm on fox,
channel 5. it will also be shown again later on
today-friday, mar 18- at 10:45pm. we were happy with the
piece and thought it portrayed anoopa accurately.

a memorial will be held in atlanta by the rollins school
of public health, i believe, in the next week or so.
unfortunately, my family will not be attending this.
also, my family will be holding a memorial for anoopa in
virginia in 1-2 weeks. please continue to check the
website www.anoopa.net for updates as amy and i will no
longer be emailing people directly and spread the news to
others who are not aware of this change.

life can change in an instant. now i know.

hugs to all,
uttama

Uttama also wanted to share this quote from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran:

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and
to melt into the sun? And what is it to cease breathing but to free the
breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek
God unencumbered?

Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you
indeed sing. And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall
begin to climb. And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then
shall you truly dance. "

Many people have written requesting information about what happened to Anoopa, since previously there was no mention of the car accident. Anoopa was in a car accident in rural Alabama on March 5, 2005. She had been at a conference organized by Physicians for Human Rights at the University of Alabama at Birmingham with fellow Emory student and friend Jed Stevenson. They were on a two-lane highway when a car coming from the other direction pulled into their lane. They collided, with the impact at the driver’s side corner of Anoopa’s car; Anoopa was driving. She was cut out of the car and flown to UAB Birmingham Hospital with major injuries to her brain, lungs, and her left leg. She hung on in a coma for nearly nine days, some of those days showing slight improvement in the condition of her lungs. She gave us a little time to say goodbye, and she kept the uninjured parts of her body strong and healthy for organ donations. The damage to her brain was severe, and she passed away in the evening of March 14, 2005. She would be proud to know many of her organs were transplanted to people in need, and she would be grateful that Jed is recovering well from a broken rib and broken finger.

Many friends and family (and also strangers who have come upon Anoopa's story) are interested in making some sort of contribution in her name. Her father Dennis Sharma will be establishing an opportunity for us to do so in time. As a director for the United States Agency for International Development, we can be assured a special opportunity to help a cause for which Anoopa herself was very passionate. Please be patient as the decisions are made and logistics set. More information will be posted here as it becomes available, so continue to check the site.

Tonight at 5:00PM EST, Atlanta's Fox channel 5 local news will be reporting on Anoopa's case. They interviewed the Sharmas last night about her interest in public health and her organ donation.

Update: The video is now online.

A little bit of good news to brighten everyone's spirits! Uttama is a 4th year medical student at University of Virginia. Today is "match day" for 4th years across the country, when students find out which of their prefered programs for residency have accepted them. Uttama learned today that she got her first choice match! She will be working in family medicine in Santa Rosa, CA. Congratulations, Uttama!!

Here is a note from Uttama from yesterday.

hi everyone,

today a religious ceremony was held for anoopa before the
cremation and many of anoopa's friends and family members
were in attendance.  most friends have now left.  this
evening a few family members went to the cahaba river and
freed anoopa's ashes.  it was a lovely and peaceful spot.
now her soul is free to wander where it wishes.  a friend
told us there is a special lily known as the cahaba lily
that grows nowhere else in the world but the cahaba river.

tomorrow-thursday-my family will be heading to atlanta to
pack up anoopa's belongings.

we will be holding a memorial service in northern virginia
and will notify everyone about the exact date when it has
been decided.  there may also be a memorial service held
in the next few days in atlanta.

i hope everyone is doing okay.

peace to all,
uttama

Here is a message from Uttama.

Hi everyone,

I am extremely sorry to be notifying all of you of this news through an impersonal method such as email.

Anoopa was declared clinically brain dead yesterday evening after a neurological exam was done by two different doctors showing an absence of all brainstem reflexes. Also, a scan was done showing a lack of blood flow to her brain. Her organs will be removed in the next few hours and be in the bodies of their respective recipients within 36 hours. Happily, a member of the organ transplant team told us that Anoopa’s organs could potentially help improve the lives of 108 patients. All in one day! Pretty amazing. Her blood type is O- (the universal donor) which makes the pool of people to which her organs can be donated larger. Anoopa will be cremated here in Birmingham tomorrow around 10am and a religious ceremony will be done by a local Hindu priest at the same time. Her ashes will most likely be scattered here somewhere in nature, probably a river.

15 of us held hands in a circle in her hospital room yesterday evening. She was also part of the circle as we held her hands as well. We all went around and told of one or many ways in which Anoopa had touched us. We wish her spirit finds freedom and peace.

Again, you can go to her website www.anoopa.net to see people's thoughts, etc.

Uttama

Please continue to visit this website to celebrate the life of Anoopa Sharma. Add links, share memories, and email photos to be added.

My love and best wishes to you all,

Amy

Here is the latest email from Anoopa's sister Uttama.

Hi everyone,

Unfortunately, things have taken a turn for the worse with Anoopa's condition. Some of you may know that I flew back to washington dc on sunday-yesterday and was planning on going back to school for a few days to wrap some things up before heading back to birmingham. I was planning on a long stay in birmingham-at least several months. My parents called me soon after i arrived in dc and told me to fly back today-monday because anoopa's condition had worsened.

A second CT scan of her brain was done on Sunday which looked much worse than the first CT of her brain. According to the doctors, she has severe brain damage in her frontal and temporal lobes. They have now removed all the paralytic and sedative drugs and did a neurological exam. She is missing most of her reflexes at this point, a very bad sign. This new news has surprised most of us, as if we had thought that she had moved out of the danger zone, since she managed to survive the first week after the accident.

She may pass away in the next 12 hours or more. If she does, we have decided to donate all her organs and cremate her. We believe this is what she would have wanted. Also, we have decided not to artificially prolong her life as we believe she would not want to be a 'vegetable'.

Currently many friends of Anoopa and family members are here. 16 people have been here today and several more might be coming.

i can't believe it has been over a week since this whole thing started. Many lives have been changed forever. Thanks for your love and concern.

Sincerely,

Uttama